How-To Not Make a How-To Guide

Woof. What a week. We learned about HTML and I made some personal discoveries about the dangers of leaving projects for too long unattended, and, simultaneously, doing proper research on something before deciding on a project theme in the first place.

My How-To guide was over something that I had little experience in (Linux, that tricky operating system). I thought of course that it wouldn’t be that hard. Why would it? Many people had installed it with distros that were not nearly so easy to use as the distro that I used in my guide. Surely it should not be as hard to talk about as those earlier iterations, right? Surely it has gotten easier to install over the years, right?

Oh reader. Hubris is a punishing teacher.

Linux is not easy to install. It feels obvious to say so in hindsight, but it is not nearly so easy as I thought it would be. After all, there are many other how-to guides that are much, much longer than what I wrote. This is because, shocker! It’s hard to install. Operating systems are not easy to reduce down because downloading them requires some level of inherent knowledge of a computer. You need to know what a BIOS is and how to access it. You need to know how to backup all the files on your computer. You need to know how to use access terminals. If you’re switching to freeware, you need to know how to debug things on your own. You need to know how to deal with something that is not packaged for people who know little to nothing about computers. It’s why so many computers come preloaded with operating systems. It’s difficult.

I’d like to think I’m relatively technologically competent. Competent with deadlines? Not really. Competent with timing? No. But technologically speaking, I would like to say I’ve got some level of expertise with it. I would have some level of difficulty getting it to work. A how-to guide where I am still trying to learn how to make Markdown look good and learning the basics of HTML is not the time to start learning about an entirely new operating system. Thank you, hubris. I will take this lesson to the future for the next two projects.

Speaking of HTML, that was primarily what we were practicing this week. It’s surprisingly similar to coding languages, even though it’s not really coding. It has that same level of ‘computer logic,’ which is the best way I can describe it. It’s a roundabout, literal way of thinking of things. I’m sure I’ll find all the different ways for a webpage to misinterpret what I’m trying to say because I took a shortcut somewhere and didn’t specify that to the document.

I know I may sound pessimistic, but I am excited to work with it. I do enjoy computer logic and how it functions. It’s a level of specificity that I rarely see in my degree of choice. There is a wrong and right way to make things with computer logic. It’s like a puzzle to see your vision realized. While I hope I don’t do something as silly as trying to explain something that has defied easy explanation for years next time, I’m excited to pick up a new skill that I get to use for the future. I already have ideas for webpages. I’d like to surprise my Dungeons & Dragons GM with my character sheet that I made on a webpage. It’s just silly enough for me to have fun making it.

---

Edit (12/13): It’s very interesting coming back to this post after 2 other big projects. I feel fairly confident in saying that this post is not going to be seen by anybody other than the professor of the class I’m writing this for, though if there is anybody who ends up perusing this site, do know that I looked back at my old posts and reread them. I wonder if I will continue to do so in the future.

“Hubris is a punishing teacher.” How right I was. It’s a little annoying that despite it all, I’m apparently not that good of a student. Hubris is a punishing teacher but I learn slowly. Or perhaps I need a more gentle hand. Who knows.

That HTML project I mentioned up above that I was excited for turned into something nasty as well. Hubris. And a project in Twine (which, if you don’t know what that is, is an HTML game development engine I suppose would be the best way to describe it) turned into something painful too.

Dear reader, I wonder if I will learn. There’s not much for me to say here beyond what has happened and what I’ve done (or not done, so to speak.) In general I’m happy with my writing. I try to only put out what I’m proud of; otherwise, it will stick in my mind like a hook through a fish.

Despite it all, despite everything I’ve said here, despite failing to get everything done, I did enjoy this experience. I did like it. It feels a little late to say that now, but I truly did.

If you are reading this and you feel seen, if you read this and you also feel a sense of despondency surrounding your ability to do things that’s hard to explain, I understand you. I feel it too. Let me leave you at the end of this semester with some parting words.

It’s not easy. It’s not fair (though it is for most others). You’re not lazy for struggling to get this done. You’re just struggling. And to struggle is not a moral failing, nor an indictment of character. Sometimes, even if you don’t wish to admit it, sometimes you need help. And to need help is not a moral failing, nor an indictment of character. If there’s one thing I could tell myself at the beginning of the semester, it would be that.

It’s all going to be okay. We’ll figure it out together. The day continues. Have a good one, dear reader.